I had some extreme pain today due to my MS and balance problems too.

Starman is just a superb film, a real 1984 classic. Favourite scenes: a) a deer being brought back to life, b) Starman hold lady out of a fireball inferno, c) the alien spaceship landing lights and snow whereby Starman goes home back to his own world. Why a sequel of this film was never made featuring the baby alien the female character had carried I have no idea. I’d have called the sequel “Starlad”. I really love this film, my next of kin failed to appreciate 1980’s superb movies and missed the opportunity to see it.

After Starman I watched Celebrity Family Fortunes staring stunning Holly Willoughby with rather dull Eamon Holmes. I also noticed with sharp eyes that Eamon Holmes failed to put his hands behind his back when told to do so by Vernon Kaye. This was probably an accident but Eamon Holmes had his hand by his side instead of behind his back like Holly Willoughby herself observed. An rather interesting question came up – Name a non-living object that has an eye? The word potato came up as did the London Eye. Put simply if I’d been asked this question myself I’d have had no idea what to say or answer. I also think an extra round whereby the family members at the end of the row get to play should definitely happen. Two photographs I saw were Holly Willoughby a young child brunette supporting a sweet hand muff and Eamon Holmes a young boy dressed similar to a cowboy which was an old black and white photograph.

On ITV1 News tonight my heart goes out to an old teacher guy who apparently lost his life in a coach crash in France, may he now rest inpeace, and the Coalition is holding a health summit but is apparently not inviting everyone who should be there. For example, known parties who currently have some grave reservations about where the Coalition Government is going on this. I myself fully support and endorse the general principle of GP’s, even my own in particular, commissioning/putting in place what they believe is right for their patients. I believe if my own GP could do this at present I may not have quite as many hassles and problems with being bounced around like a beach ball by the health and social service individuals.

I feel very bunged up, my MS and my waterworks and my guess the other, are meaning I’m in an awful lot of pain. A bad stomach all round.

I meet my new male shrink for the first time at the end of this week. I simply have no idea what he will see when he glances at me. My local mental health team so far appear to see me more as someone who is difficult and demanding. This is not the real Lydia I assure you, but I am someone who feels intense emotions attached to my Multiple Post Traumatic Stress disorder symptoms. As yet they have yet to join the dots to get a true picture of the real me. My true aim is simple – I want an independent budget that I can use in a flexible and agreed way to meet my multi-complex disability needs. These people clearly have a problem of interpreting me as a whole person. The present system seems unable to work together or create an independent budget that encompasses all my multi-complex disabilities, or a meeting together to iron out, like a shirt, some of these issues & problems. My life is near constantly up and down, and my Bipolar II type disorder as a result clearly worsens. They say to me I am “too angry to work with”, but if they were me or knew me a good deal better they would better interpret the genuine lovely girl that is Lydia.

I saw on ITV1 tonight a trailer for a new programme on ITV1 entitled “The Agenda” This is presented by Mr Tom Bradby, it doesn’t look as good as the inspiring “Tonight” programme but is probably well worth watching folks!

My Freeview recordable box still appears very broken. This has caused me some upset but now the 5* channel is on Freesat, I hope one day to have a Freesat recordable box installed into my joint. I’m just too broke for this at the moment.