I haven’t really been blogging for little while as I have been suffering from frequent bouts of sever depression and nausea. A couple of weeks ago discussions broke down between myself and advocacy involved. It feels like people want to judge or know up-front what money I can pay towards all my care needs. I have always strived with a constant lack of funds to strike a balance between health, social and treatment type needs, i.e. having to pay privately for maintenance physio that is not available on the NHS. I need a physio to do physio exercises with me. Life feels cruel and some able-bodied people can not always comprehend how managing a long term illness or disability is like. With all my problems the cost keep rising and the NHS and Social Services cut with very sharp scissors and make unreasonable decisions that most people themselves could not live with if they themselves were ill or disabled.

I’ve had an average weekend but my spine feels very painfull and inflamed, and my balance is not that good either. I could be doing worse but feel guilty as the people who should help me cannot comprehend the enigma that is me.

Take care all, I hope you will carry on reading my blogs, I’m not being pessimistic but I do try to see the good in people and places where I can. Goodbye for now all. 😕